A letter to Balthazar and Lysander, from my partner Kirsty.
Dear Zaza and Sasha,
So, you’re going to be big brothers!
Congratulations, my beautiful little ones! You are going to be big brothers. This means such a myriad of things for you, for us. They aren’t all going to be easy, but I promise that your childhood is going to be full to the brim of beautiful memories, regardless.
Things are going to change. YOU are going to change so much in between now and the arrival of your siblings; the difference between 15 months and 20 months is vast. I can’t predict how you, at such a young age, are going to take to these new little people, but I watch you play sometimes, kissing the babies in books and cuddling your dolls and touching each other’s hair or patting each other’s backs when one is sad and I have this hopeful feeling that you are going to be GOOD at this, my darlings. You are such loving boys, full of affection (however brief these moments are in toddlerhood) and joy and I hope so much that you will enjoy your new siblings.
Don’t get me wrong, there is going to be a LOT of fighting over the years. Sometimes, perhaps often, it’s going to be hard for you. I’ve never left you and you aren’t used to sharing me with anyone but each other. You aren’t used to there being four of you as my priority, but I promise you, little loves, I know that I will be giving the four of you very nearly everything I have, and that is more than okay by me. There will always be enough time for you, or at the very least, I wil never stop trying to make that the case. There will always be kisses and cuddles and reassurance when you need it. I promise to do my absolute best to always listen to you, or to remember to return to what you were saying as soon as I can. I promise to involve you. We are a team; we have always been a team and now that we are expanding, I promise that you won’t be pushed out. It will be all of us, we will all be in this together, as much as you want to be. I promise, I know what we are getting in to and this choice was never made lightly.
I love you. You are already wonderful big brothers without meaning to be – after all, a year with you has shaped me and made me a mother. You have already given your tiny, unborn siblings that.
Hold tight, sweet ones. 2016 is going to be an amazing year.
With love from mummy xx