As I write this, the little girls are kicking away and I cannot help but think about how strange it is that this is our last ever Me & Mine as a family of five humans and a dog, that this time next month without a doubt the girls will be here in our arms. It feels like only the other day that they were conceived in a white room, that they implanted (it felt like a cross between cramping and pinching), that we confirmed the pregnancy, heard the heartbeats, learnt that they were girls. And now they are due.
This month has been an easier month. I think it’s because we know that we are almost there, that the end is in sight. This month has been, for me, about making the most of my little family. There have been some rocky moments, of course, but some beautiful memories as well.
The little boys are such toddlers now. This month Kirsty has uploaded some adorable ‘twin moment‘ videos that capture their bond. They love to snog each other’s faces and to be together, they ask for the other if they find themselves alone. Sometimes they play really well and sometimes they bash and bite each other but I’m told that is par for the course for twenty-month olds! They are the sweetest and most loving little people most of the time, free with hugs and kisses and always keen to share their games, but then they have these incredible ‘terrible twos’ moments where it is like having teenagers in the house – they howl, they stomp, they toss their hair and I swear that once or twice doors have been slammed. They are the best little people.
This month they met their second-cousin Jake for the first time after he came all the way from Melbourne, and we discovered that Balthazar at least is a bit frightened of mobile babies. Jake came shuffling over and Balthazar couldn’t get away fast enough, actually climbing up on an armchair with ‘his’ toy cars to get away from him! It was probably one of the funniest things that I have ever seen. They spent some time with their great-grandfather as well and on the same occasion tried their first doughnut, thanks to our local bakery who make fab toddler-sized doughnuts that are perfect for a very occasional treat. There were two very sticky mouths but they definitely approved! We try not to give them sugary treats on the whole, mostly because there just doesn’t seem to be a point when they’re this age, but a little treat occasionally doesn’t seem to do any harm and they were so happy to have their own little treat whilst the grown-ups ate cake.
We have been finalising the last of the things that we really need to do before the girls come, although we still don’t have curtains for the living room and I’m a little worried that the curtains that I love have gone out of stock and may never come back. It is probably just the hormones talking but I have as good as cried over those curtains. We’re planning a water birth, or at least a mess-contained-in-pool birth even if we never get round to filling it, and the pool has been delivered and is sitting in its box on my living room sofa, making me feel a little giddy whenever I look at it! The nursery is almost finished and I can’t wait to share where the girls will be sleeping, and Kirsty is making beautiful cord ties that they will wear on their umbilical stumps instead of clamps. It’s all feeling quite close now and I’ll be glad when these things have been ticked off of the list, but also a bit lost – what will we do whilst we wait?
Last week I had an iron infusion in preparation for the birth, and I made a little vlog of it as well. I think it must be working as I feel less faint and exhausted; we really want my haemoglobin up from 8ish to 10g/l so I’m keeping everything crossed that it’s done the job and I can go ahead with my planned home birth. I am still working but I’ve told everyone else that I plan to become a hermit for this next little period of time because I hate being watched – I just want to hide away with my little family, take long baths and eat my bodyweight in flying saucers. So if you know me ‘in real life’ please don’t expect much from me at the moment and please forgive me for being, frankly, rude at best when I don’t ‘like’ your statuses or respond to your texts.
Time with family aside, I was so relieved to be able to attend Britmums Live earlier this month and flabbergasted to win the Photography category. The other finalists made seriously formidable competition and are all women whose work I admire tremendously; I felt honored simply to rank amongst them.
So that was our admittedly rather quiet month! I’m looking forward to seeing what (who) the next few weeks brings us.